I absolutely loved a quote from Mother Teresa, so I posted it on my blog immediately last night… I read it and felt as if she said it for me; and said it for me to be read on this particular day.. It happens with me quite a lot actually..I get the answers to those questions that, though are unasked even in my head, but they are creating certain nuisances within me. So reading it worked as a reminder; one that is to solidify my raw and fluid thought which was refusing to take any particular shape.
We do good sometimes, good for others, aware of the fact that they don’t know and they may never find out, yet we do it. Sometimes it hurts not receiving any acknowledgement from the other end, yet we continue; sometimes the credit reaches someone else, and we are standing in a corner hoping the recipient would clarify and put us forward, but ofcourse that does not happen, and we still continue after all.. why?… even though our outer, oh so strong self may not recognize, but I think we have a subconscious that is not in any oblivion to the perpetual presence of a Being.
We do good, we expect good in return…and then we are hurt and disappointed ..so I ‘ve been telling myself over and over lately that expect good in return, but only from God…He will not wrong anyone…He is the only One who can redeem…our reward is with our God.
So, we need to absorb this fact first that people are not going to acknowledge…they may sometime coincidentally… do good to these people for your God.
But then I feel there is slight bitterness attached to this lesson…and thats where capacities come into play…the lesson above that I tried to absorb has to go in conjunction with another realization. That people are not mean by nature..thats not why they do not acknowledge… I don’t want to expend all my energies trying to misjudge their intentions, because its true they are not evil…we just have to satisfy ourselves on that one… that we are inherently incapable of coming up to people’s expectations..No matter what we do, we always fall short, because of our limited capacity, not because we intended not to.
The two feelings need to go hand in hand..we won’t be disappointed, we’ll know our rewards sits with God.. so, we’ll keep doing good, without expecting any favors or acknowledgements from men…but remember, not because they are mean, but because we, including very much myself, are incapable of giving any reward, despite the determination that we keep.
We are born, and we die; just like that we expect from others and just like that we do not always come up to people’s expectations… thats just our story… I am going to keep that in mind.. for my own peace … and to remember that if one does not acknowledge, s/he is not bad, they just fall short, because thats how we are..
So this generalized trait of us, is not anymore going to keep me from doing any good that I somehow want to do… I’ll do it anyway :)